I watched
a conversation yesterday on a social media site, and I felt compelled to
address it here. It revolved around blogs, and how folks respond to their
cancer journey, especially how they write about it.
In this amazing technology-driven world that we live in, information is literally at our fingertips. In a moment's notice, we can access information (good, bad, and otherwise) from our computers, phones, etc. When we are faced with a situation we are unfamiliar with, we often refer to the internet for answers. I did.
As social media sites become more and more prevalent in our lives, people are leaning on friends (real or web-based) for details, support, information, etc. For me, this has become an essential link to others - my family and friends, other survivors, sources of information about my cancer. In talking with other survivors, I know it's vital to their fight, as well.
Having said that, there is a disadvantage to social media. It's called interpretation. I can type one thing, mean something by it, and have it be taken in a completely different way that I intended. I saw this play out yesterday, and emotions got in the way of what I know to be the true intention of the conversation.
So, I wanted to say a few things here. This blog is mine. All opinions are solely mine, and not meant to offend anyone. I started this blog over four years ago with the intention of giving my family and friends a simple way to keep up with my cancer journey. I have friends all over the world, and I didn't want to burden my family with the responsibility of sending out emails to keep everyone in the loop. This seemed the most feasible way to do that.
As the blog evolved and my desire to become more active in crc advocacy became stronger, I tried to transition this blog to a combination personal/advocacy information site, where someone could read about my personal journey (in a real, no-hoolds-barred kind of way) and where I could also inform folks about new things I come across, etc. I've decided that if my journey (and documenting it) can help someone else out, then it's worth the time I spend on this blog.
Beyond all of that, it's interesting to go back and read what I've been through, to re-read what my thoughts were at a given time, and to experience my life at a later date.
My opinions, feelings, etc. are not meant to influence anyone, in any way. I try to keep this real, and if you know me in person, I (hope) think you'll see that this blog reflects the real me. I'm optimistic but realistic. I try to temper my glass-half-full attitude with enough realism that I don't overlook the obvious. I have days where posts are going to be overly optimistic - because that's how I'm feeling that day. (Case in point - Daughtry!) I also have other days when I feel like shit, and my posts are going to reflect that.
That's real life, people. That's normal, whether or not you are battling cancer. Life can be wonderful, and life can suck. That's the beauty.
Basically, what I wanted to get across is that my blog is not, in any way, meant to set an expectation of how you are going to or should deal with cancer. This is *my* experience; my experience with this disease, how it effects my family and friends, and how it effects my life. In no way do I expect your experience to be like mine. This disease sucks. Every single person that is faced with this disease will handle it differently. Their cancer is unique, their treatment is unique - THEY ARE UNIQUE. Some will handle it easily - they will be able to work, remain active, continue to live life as if cancer is nothing more than a small big to be squashed. Others will struggle with their cancer, their treatment, etc. Their cancer will completely and utterly alter their lives in ways that they can't begin to imagine, and they will never again be the same person.
This is not fair. It's true. But, it's not fair.
I just wanted to let you know, if you're reading this blog with the hopes that you'll learn how you are going to handle your cancer, please stop. You are going to react differently than I do. It's the way it works. And, that's ok.
Please don't use my blog as a way to plot out your cancer journey. Forge your own road. Yes, I'm optimistic. I want to live. As I've always said, I have babies to raise. But, I'm also realistic. I have stage four colon cancer. I will not have the life-span I once expected. I will likely not live until my 80s or 90s. It sucks, but it's reality. Until then, you can bet your ASS that I'll be living every single moment of my life with a zest and by ensuring I'm setting a hell of an example for my kids. I want them to know that, regardless of the cards you're dealt, you can make a good hand. You can make a damn good life.
If there's one thing you can take from this blog, please let it be that. You can make a *damn* good life. Just make it yours.
In this amazing technology-driven world that we live in, information is literally at our fingertips. In a moment's notice, we can access information (good, bad, and otherwise) from our computers, phones, etc. When we are faced with a situation we are unfamiliar with, we often refer to the internet for answers. I did.
As social media sites become more and more prevalent in our lives, people are leaning on friends (real or web-based) for details, support, information, etc. For me, this has become an essential link to others - my family and friends, other survivors, sources of information about my cancer. In talking with other survivors, I know it's vital to their fight, as well.
Having said that, there is a disadvantage to social media. It's called interpretation. I can type one thing, mean something by it, and have it be taken in a completely different way that I intended. I saw this play out yesterday, and emotions got in the way of what I know to be the true intention of the conversation.
So, I wanted to say a few things here. This blog is mine. All opinions are solely mine, and not meant to offend anyone. I started this blog over four years ago with the intention of giving my family and friends a simple way to keep up with my cancer journey. I have friends all over the world, and I didn't want to burden my family with the responsibility of sending out emails to keep everyone in the loop. This seemed the most feasible way to do that.
As the blog evolved and my desire to become more active in crc advocacy became stronger, I tried to transition this blog to a combination personal/advocacy information site, where someone could read about my personal journey (in a real, no-hoolds-barred kind of way) and where I could also inform folks about new things I come across, etc. I've decided that if my journey (and documenting it) can help someone else out, then it's worth the time I spend on this blog.
Beyond all of that, it's interesting to go back and read what I've been through, to re-read what my thoughts were at a given time, and to experience my life at a later date.
My opinions, feelings, etc. are not meant to influence anyone, in any way. I try to keep this real, and if you know me in person, I (hope) think you'll see that this blog reflects the real me. I'm optimistic but realistic. I try to temper my glass-half-full attitude with enough realism that I don't overlook the obvious. I have days where posts are going to be overly optimistic - because that's how I'm feeling that day. (Case in point - Daughtry!) I also have other days when I feel like shit, and my posts are going to reflect that.
That's real life, people. That's normal, whether or not you are battling cancer. Life can be wonderful, and life can suck. That's the beauty.
Basically, what I wanted to get across is that my blog is not, in any way, meant to set an expectation of how you are going to or should deal with cancer. This is *my* experience; my experience with this disease, how it effects my family and friends, and how it effects my life. In no way do I expect your experience to be like mine. This disease sucks. Every single person that is faced with this disease will handle it differently. Their cancer is unique, their treatment is unique - THEY ARE UNIQUE. Some will handle it easily - they will be able to work, remain active, continue to live life as if cancer is nothing more than a small big to be squashed. Others will struggle with their cancer, their treatment, etc. Their cancer will completely and utterly alter their lives in ways that they can't begin to imagine, and they will never again be the same person.
This is not fair. It's true. But, it's not fair.
I just wanted to let you know, if you're reading this blog with the hopes that you'll learn how you are going to handle your cancer, please stop. You are going to react differently than I do. It's the way it works. And, that's ok.
Please don't use my blog as a way to plot out your cancer journey. Forge your own road. Yes, I'm optimistic. I want to live. As I've always said, I have babies to raise. But, I'm also realistic. I have stage four colon cancer. I will not have the life-span I once expected. I will likely not live until my 80s or 90s. It sucks, but it's reality. Until then, you can bet your ASS that I'll be living every single moment of my life with a zest and by ensuring I'm setting a hell of an example for my kids. I want them to know that, regardless of the cards you're dealt, you can make a good hand. You can make a damn good life.
If there's one thing you can take from this blog, please let it be that. You can make a *damn* good life. Just make it yours.
Comments:
JasonB said...
Yes,
yes, yes! I think some people turn to the internet for medical information
(diagnosis, prognosis, first hand experiences) because it is a lot easier than speaking
to someone face to face. You have done a remarkable job sharing your journey
and yes, it is *your* journey.
July
31, 2012 at 9:47 AM
Whoopsie!
Above comment is from me...didn't realize the hubby had signed into to Google
on the desktop! :)
July
31, 2012 at 9:49 AM
Beautifully
said.
July
31, 2012 at 10:50 AM
Akemiko said...
Wish
more people would write honestly like you, rather than for popularity or raise
controversy. Because I know you personally (and wish all people could know you)
you're writing from the heart and from the soul. Inspires, captivates and lets
us peek into the life of one of the most wonderful women I know. Keep writing!
July
31, 2012 at 11:21 AM
I'm
also diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer in March of this year. I'm 39 with 4
kids.
I will be following your journey.
http://lisaanniepants.blogspot.com/
I will be following your journey.
http://lisaanniepants.blogspot.com/
August
10, 2012 at 11:23 AM
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