Today
would have been Kim's 30th birthday. There's plenty of room for introspection
for me personally on this day, remembering back to where I was on my 30th,
where we all wish Kim was, where we know she is, etc. But, it's early, I
haven't had a lot of coffee yet, and well, I have plans and need to get to
them. :-)
So, I wanted to let you know that if you are in the Phoenix area, we are all working a car wash today at the Circle K at the I-10 and Litchfield in Goodyear to benefit the family. 8am-12pm today. All proceeds will go to the family. Hoping to make a TON of money to help them pay for Kim's medical expenses. I have donated a ton of materials from CCA and I was able to get a LOT of information from CTCA to hand out to people at this carwash, because while it's important to raise money for the family, it's also important to raise awareness about this disease to ensure that no other families have to suffer the way her family has had to.
There is also a fundraiser happening at a hair salon in Goodyear, including free haircuts for firemen and police officers.
All information can be found on Kim's blog site at http://kimfightscancer.blogspot.com.
Hope to see you there...
So, I wanted to let you know that if you are in the Phoenix area, we are all working a car wash today at the Circle K at the I-10 and Litchfield in Goodyear to benefit the family. 8am-12pm today. All proceeds will go to the family. Hoping to make a TON of money to help them pay for Kim's medical expenses. I have donated a ton of materials from CCA and I was able to get a LOT of information from CTCA to hand out to people at this carwash, because while it's important to raise money for the family, it's also important to raise awareness about this disease to ensure that no other families have to suffer the way her family has had to.
There is also a fundraiser happening at a hair salon in Goodyear, including free haircuts for firemen and police officers.
All information can be found on Kim's blog site at http://kimfightscancer.blogspot.com.
Hope to see you there...
No Comments
Later:
...I saw
the most amazing thing, Kim. I know you were there, but I know that you also
have SO MANY people to watch over that perhaps you weren't there to see
everything. So, here you go - here's the story of your 30th birthday party,
from my perspective.
I started the day with a cup of coffee and a little reflection time. Then, I headed to the store to pick up some water, because it was scheduled to be 104 degrees today. A little warm, but we were all ready and willing to be there, sun-screen-slathered and washing-car-fools.
I got to the Circle K around 7:15 and and Sammy, Scott and I started getting things unpacked and set up. People started coming in, and by 8am we had our first car ready. You should have seen the kids from Millenium Key Club, Kim. They made shirts of royal blue with different sayings, and were SO EXCITED to be there to help. But, in my typically outspoken fashion, I did scare the bejeezus out of the kids by telling them exactly what we were here for - I told them about colon cancer, symptoms, and treatments. I told them what happened to you and I, and why you died. I know that I scared them, but I also got their attention and taught them about our disease. And, maybe, I gave them enough information to save one of them later in life.
We know you were there with us because your mom (or Aunt Kathy....it might have been her, now that I think about it....) brought birthday balloons, and you took one of them! :-) It was awesome - there it was, blowing in the breeze, then POOF - off it went to the blue skies. Very cool.
Anyways, to make a long story short, the car wash was a ROUSING success, and we raised amazing amounts of money for Deron and the kids (over $2,000!). There were SO MANY people there to help out - we had so many volunteers that it was almost overwhelming. At some points, there were 8 cars in line to get their cars washed. We had people walk up and just give us money - no car wash needed. And Kim, they weren't giving 3 or 4 dollars - try $40, $50, $60 at a time. Amazing generosity was shown today - it was truly a testament to human spirit and the amazing kindness in people.
After the car wash (and lunch, kindly provided by Chik-Fil-A), the whole crew went over to the cemetary to say hello to you and sing you Happy Birthday. I know you were there with us - as soon as I got there, two separate dragonflies fluttered by and I know it was you, saying hi. After hanging out there for a while waiting for everyone to get there (by the way, I don't spend the day in the sun for just anyone - that's true friendship and love, my dear...), we all gathered around your grave and sang you "Happy Birthday." Beautiful - all of us had balloons in our hands, and the song was carried on the wind all around us. Your Aunt Kathy said a few words, and then asked if anyone else wanted to say something. Kim - this is my favorite part of the day - Julia, my little baby girl who's growing up before my very eyes, told Kathy that she wanted to say a few words. I won't ever be able to remember exactly what she said, but her speech was simple and humble and just perfect - it was something along the lines of "Kim was a great friend, and I'm so glad that she was my friend." There were tears all around, and everyone was just blown away by my daughter's honesty, and how it spoke to everyone. Truly - all of the words that we would like to say about you - Julia captured in pure, perfect childlike simplicity and innocence. No one could have said it better.
After Julia made us all cry, we sang you "Happy Birthday" one more time, then let the balloons go. I can't wait to see the pictures Natty took - the sight of all of your balloons heading towards the heavens and towards you was breathtaking. I can only imagine what the people driving by thought. :-)
The kids and I headed out to head to your house, and as I was driving away, your mom called my phone. Apparently, you wanted to be there enough to show up again, and I am so glad you did. I had told your mom earlier in the day about the tattoo I am going to get. In your honor. It's going to be on my left shoulder (maybe right - who knows...) and it's a dragonfly with brown eyes, bright green and purple wings, and a blue ribbon behind it. She was pretty happy about it and about the story, though I don't know if she believed that you show up to me when I need you most. Until, after we sent the balloons your way. You showed up in dragonfly-form, flew around everyone standing at your grave, flew around the balloons your mom put on your grave marker, then settled on the flowers that Deron, Natty, Erin and Randi brought you. And just kind of hung out. It's like you were saying, HI GUYS! So good to see you! Your mom called me in tears, and was beside herself. Natty and Randi got some pictures, and I can't wait to see them. At one point, according to Natty, someone called the dragonfly "it" and Nan immediately scolded them, telling them that YOU had a name, and to call the dragonfly "Kim." She's a believer now....
After your arrival and departure, we all headed back to your house for a little chaos, lots of aughter and love, and a little reminiscing. I wasn't able to stay long, but the time I was there was SO MUCH FUN. I really wish you could have been there. You would have had a blast seeing everyone there, hanging out in your house and just chilling. I got to meet the most amazing people, and my mom and I had a wonderful time talking with some of your friends.
Kim, your friends and family miss you SO MUCH. I know that you can see us and feel the love, but it's so hard seeing Kiki struggle at your grave. Seeing Dylan try to find a comfortable place for himself in the world. Seeing Deron try to figure out what he's supposed to be doing - what's normal, why normal is so important to people, and how he can try to get some semblence of "schedule" back in his life. He and I had a really special (to me) talk. He is returning to work on Wednesday, and people keep telling him that it's good to return to normalcy. But, how can life be normal for him, he asked me. His wife is dead, and normal isn't a possibility for him. So, I reminded him that normal is what's normal to him.....not what's normal to me, or anyone else. And, it was just good for him to talk with someone a little bit about how very NOT NORMAL life is right now.
There aren't words that can possibly describe how grateful I am to have been able to take part in today. To be able to spend this day with you, your friends and your family was just unbelievable to me. You aren't here in your body, and that loss and pain is felt by everyone in every step we take. You mom today slipped and said, "We'll just call Kim" in response to a question we asked. Her pain is SO evident. You dad is so strong and capable and amazing. Your brother's dedication to you and to your family is nothing less than inspirational. Your friends' and family's love for you and for this cause is completely overwhelming. Being allowed to be a part of that is, well, again - there aren't words.
Kim, on your 30th birthday, I am settled knowing that you aren't in pain....that you didn't have to spend this very special day struggling to breathe or sit up or eat. I am so glad that you are healthy and whole. And, yet, very selfishly, I am so sad that I couldn't spend this day with you. It is so hard to see your legacy live on, rather than seeing you live on. And yet, you will live on forever, inside every single one of us. Your inner beauty outshined your outer beauty, and that takes a lot, let me tell you. People refer to your beauty, but more often than that, they talk about your ability to be friendly to people, to make them feel comfortable and to allow people to be a part of you. You gave each and every person you met a little bit of your heart. And, that piece of you lives in each of us. We all struggle with the very real fact that you aren't here with us anymore. But, we are all better people because of you, and there aren't many people that have that effect on others.
So, thank you for letting me spend your 30th birthday celebrating your life with your family. It was truly, amazingly, and humbly my pleasure.
Missing you. Love you. Talk with you later, my friend...
I started the day with a cup of coffee and a little reflection time. Then, I headed to the store to pick up some water, because it was scheduled to be 104 degrees today. A little warm, but we were all ready and willing to be there, sun-screen-slathered and washing-car-fools.
I got to the Circle K around 7:15 and and Sammy, Scott and I started getting things unpacked and set up. People started coming in, and by 8am we had our first car ready. You should have seen the kids from Millenium Key Club, Kim. They made shirts of royal blue with different sayings, and were SO EXCITED to be there to help. But, in my typically outspoken fashion, I did scare the bejeezus out of the kids by telling them exactly what we were here for - I told them about colon cancer, symptoms, and treatments. I told them what happened to you and I, and why you died. I know that I scared them, but I also got their attention and taught them about our disease. And, maybe, I gave them enough information to save one of them later in life.
We know you were there with us because your mom (or Aunt Kathy....it might have been her, now that I think about it....) brought birthday balloons, and you took one of them! :-) It was awesome - there it was, blowing in the breeze, then POOF - off it went to the blue skies. Very cool.
Anyways, to make a long story short, the car wash was a ROUSING success, and we raised amazing amounts of money for Deron and the kids (over $2,000!). There were SO MANY people there to help out - we had so many volunteers that it was almost overwhelming. At some points, there were 8 cars in line to get their cars washed. We had people walk up and just give us money - no car wash needed. And Kim, they weren't giving 3 or 4 dollars - try $40, $50, $60 at a time. Amazing generosity was shown today - it was truly a testament to human spirit and the amazing kindness in people.
After the car wash (and lunch, kindly provided by Chik-Fil-A), the whole crew went over to the cemetary to say hello to you and sing you Happy Birthday. I know you were there with us - as soon as I got there, two separate dragonflies fluttered by and I know it was you, saying hi. After hanging out there for a while waiting for everyone to get there (by the way, I don't spend the day in the sun for just anyone - that's true friendship and love, my dear...), we all gathered around your grave and sang you "Happy Birthday." Beautiful - all of us had balloons in our hands, and the song was carried on the wind all around us. Your Aunt Kathy said a few words, and then asked if anyone else wanted to say something. Kim - this is my favorite part of the day - Julia, my little baby girl who's growing up before my very eyes, told Kathy that she wanted to say a few words. I won't ever be able to remember exactly what she said, but her speech was simple and humble and just perfect - it was something along the lines of "Kim was a great friend, and I'm so glad that she was my friend." There were tears all around, and everyone was just blown away by my daughter's honesty, and how it spoke to everyone. Truly - all of the words that we would like to say about you - Julia captured in pure, perfect childlike simplicity and innocence. No one could have said it better.
After Julia made us all cry, we sang you "Happy Birthday" one more time, then let the balloons go. I can't wait to see the pictures Natty took - the sight of all of your balloons heading towards the heavens and towards you was breathtaking. I can only imagine what the people driving by thought. :-)
The kids and I headed out to head to your house, and as I was driving away, your mom called my phone. Apparently, you wanted to be there enough to show up again, and I am so glad you did. I had told your mom earlier in the day about the tattoo I am going to get. In your honor. It's going to be on my left shoulder (maybe right - who knows...) and it's a dragonfly with brown eyes, bright green and purple wings, and a blue ribbon behind it. She was pretty happy about it and about the story, though I don't know if she believed that you show up to me when I need you most. Until, after we sent the balloons your way. You showed up in dragonfly-form, flew around everyone standing at your grave, flew around the balloons your mom put on your grave marker, then settled on the flowers that Deron, Natty, Erin and Randi brought you. And just kind of hung out. It's like you were saying, HI GUYS! So good to see you! Your mom called me in tears, and was beside herself. Natty and Randi got some pictures, and I can't wait to see them. At one point, according to Natty, someone called the dragonfly "it" and Nan immediately scolded them, telling them that YOU had a name, and to call the dragonfly "Kim." She's a believer now....
After your arrival and departure, we all headed back to your house for a little chaos, lots of aughter and love, and a little reminiscing. I wasn't able to stay long, but the time I was there was SO MUCH FUN. I really wish you could have been there. You would have had a blast seeing everyone there, hanging out in your house and just chilling. I got to meet the most amazing people, and my mom and I had a wonderful time talking with some of your friends.
Kim, your friends and family miss you SO MUCH. I know that you can see us and feel the love, but it's so hard seeing Kiki struggle at your grave. Seeing Dylan try to find a comfortable place for himself in the world. Seeing Deron try to figure out what he's supposed to be doing - what's normal, why normal is so important to people, and how he can try to get some semblence of "schedule" back in his life. He and I had a really special (to me) talk. He is returning to work on Wednesday, and people keep telling him that it's good to return to normalcy. But, how can life be normal for him, he asked me. His wife is dead, and normal isn't a possibility for him. So, I reminded him that normal is what's normal to him.....not what's normal to me, or anyone else. And, it was just good for him to talk with someone a little bit about how very NOT NORMAL life is right now.
There aren't words that can possibly describe how grateful I am to have been able to take part in today. To be able to spend this day with you, your friends and your family was just unbelievable to me. You aren't here in your body, and that loss and pain is felt by everyone in every step we take. You mom today slipped and said, "We'll just call Kim" in response to a question we asked. Her pain is SO evident. You dad is so strong and capable and amazing. Your brother's dedication to you and to your family is nothing less than inspirational. Your friends' and family's love for you and for this cause is completely overwhelming. Being allowed to be a part of that is, well, again - there aren't words.
Kim, on your 30th birthday, I am settled knowing that you aren't in pain....that you didn't have to spend this very special day struggling to breathe or sit up or eat. I am so glad that you are healthy and whole. And, yet, very selfishly, I am so sad that I couldn't spend this day with you. It is so hard to see your legacy live on, rather than seeing you live on. And yet, you will live on forever, inside every single one of us. Your inner beauty outshined your outer beauty, and that takes a lot, let me tell you. People refer to your beauty, but more often than that, they talk about your ability to be friendly to people, to make them feel comfortable and to allow people to be a part of you. You gave each and every person you met a little bit of your heart. And, that piece of you lives in each of us. We all struggle with the very real fact that you aren't here with us anymore. But, we are all better people because of you, and there aren't many people that have that effect on others.
So, thank you for letting me spend your 30th birthday celebrating your life with your family. It was truly, amazingly, and humbly my pleasure.
Missing you. Love you. Talk with you later, my friend...
Comments:
Carol
Pack Urban said...
This
was so beautiful but broke my heart reading it.
September
27, 2009 at 6:24 AM
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